Today’s blog is something that God spoke to me about yesterday in Sunday School. I want to be a better parent to my children and the best way to do that is to be a better husband for my wife. I have been married for almost 5 years and a parent for 4 years and I still have a lot to learn in these areas of life. I hope that today, I can be a blessing to parents in showing them what God showed me in getting children to obey.
Parenting is one of the hardest things I have ever done in my life.
And I still have a long way to go!
Parenting is also one of the greatest and best things I have ever done in life.
And I hope I can enjoy every minute of it.
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With that being said, probably my biggest prayer for my children is that they accept Christ as their Saviour at a young age. That they would know and understand what it means to be saved. My oldest, who is only 4, is starting to understand the difference between Heaven and Hell. She knows that if you aren’t saved, then you will go to Hell. Pray for her that as she learns and understands she would accept Christ as her Saviour.
After praying for my girls to accept Christ, I follow that up with the prayer that they would grow up loving and serving God. I want my girls to know and experience the joys and blessings of living a life that is pleasing to God. I want to establish their own beliefs and standards and convictions so that one day when they are out of my house, I don’t have to worry about if they are living for God or not.
As a parent, I know what I want for my children. I have to be the one who leads them, guides them and teaches them the way that they should go. I have to be one that makes sure that the church and the school we attend line up with what I believe. We are blessed that we attend a church that backs up what we are teaching at home and vice versa.
As my children grow up, I want them to learn to obey. I want them to obey the Word of God, myself and my wife, the authority that they find themselves under throughout life. Yes, I can teach them what they are supposed to do and things of that nature, but the Bible has some instruction for the parents in helping accomplish this.
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.” Colossians 3:18-20
I don’t want my children to obey me, just because I am their dad, I want them to obey because it is well pleasing unto the Lord. This thought has changed my outlook on what I expect from my girls. I want them to obey me and mommy. I want them to do right and listen to what we tell them. Not because it makes us happy, which it does, but because it pleases God. If we can train our children with this mindset, it will change how we do things…at least it is for me.
Looking at the above verses, I notice the order of how God listed the members of a family. He started with the wives. He told the wives to submit. I know we live in a society of women empowerment and all that, but at the end of the day, the Bible does say that in Titus 2:5 that young women should be keepers at home. Which I am thankful that I have been blessed with a job that I can provide for the family so my wife can stay home and raise my daughters. But God did say that wives need to submit to their own husbands. And then He follows it up with the phrase, “..as it is fit in their Lord.” I shouldn’t expect my wife to submit unto me if I am not submitting unto the Lord. As the head, the leader of the house, I have to do my part in following the Lord and obeying His Word, before I can expect anyone else in my family to do the same.
The next verse tells the husbands to love their wives. Whether my wife submits or not, I should love her. I think that is why God added the phrase, “…and be not bitter against them.” God is telling us to love our wives, and if they don’t submit, still love them. We shouldn’t be bitter against our wives for anything. We should love and take care of them the best we can. We need to show them support and care. They are the weaker vessel, we should be their shield to hide behind, their sword to fight the battles, their anchor in the storms of life! Husbands are to love! We aren’t to be lords or masters over our wives, we need to be lovers and helpers to them.
Then the last verse that I gave, speaks to the children. It is telling them to obey as it is well pleasing to the Lord. I believe God is a God of order and everything He says and does has a purpose behind it. I believe that God put these three verses in this order for a purpose. What God is teaching here is that we can’t expect our children to obey if the wives aren’t submitting and the husbands aren’t loving. If I really want my children to obey, than I as a husband need to do a better job loving my wife. If I really want my children to obey, than I have to be the leader than I need to be so that my wife has no issue submitting.
So parents, don’t be surprised if your child grows up and has a hard time obeying, especially if wives you have had a hard time submitting and husbands have had a hard time loving.
Wives submit to your husbands.
Husbands love your wives.
Then you will see children who obey.
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